“Abner shouted to Joab, ‘Must we go on killing each other? Don’t you realize that bitterness is the only result? How long before you call off your men from chasing their Israelite brothers?’
Then Joab said, ‘As surely as God lives, if you had not spoken up, the men would have continued chasing their brothers until morning.’”
2 Samuel 2:26–27 (NLT)
This scene makes more sense when you remember what is happening.
Saul is dead. David has been anointed king, but only Judah is following him so far. The rest of Israel is backing Saul’s son, Ishbosheth, led by Abner.
Same people. Same God. Different loyalties.
So this is not a battle against an enemy nation. It is family fighting family.
That is what makes Abner’s words feel so heavy.
Must we go on killing each other?
This is not surrender. It is recognition.
A realization that even if someone wins, everyone loses.
What stayed with me is that the fighting would not have stopped on its own.
Joab says that clearly. If Abner had not spoken up, it would have continued until morning.
That feels familiar.
There are moments when things keep going simply because no one interrupts them. Emotions are high. Momentum takes over. And stopping feels harder than continuing, even when the cost is obvious.
This made me think about how bitterness grows.
Not always from one big decision, but from a series of small ones that we never pause long enough to question.
And it made me think about how much courage it takes to be the one who says, this is not worth it anymore.
Abner speaks up.
And Joab listens.
That combination feels rare.
I do not know exactly how to apply this yet. But it made me think about the situations that keep going simply because no one names what they are becoming.
The conversations.
The conflicts.
The relationships.
Not every battle has to be fought to the end.
Some need to be stopped before bitterness is all that is left.